Wednesday, October 20, 2004

My Dream
Recently I had a dream which was both scary and awesome. I don't remember very many details, but I dreamt that I delivered a healthy baby with only the help of the mother. I was with someone in a room who was in labor, and she was waiting for her midwife or doctor, but when the doctor came in to care for the mom, she left the room and politely and cheerfully said that I would take care of the birth. She was confident in me. So I thought: "ok, this is crazy, but I'll do it. I'll deliver this baby. I am capable." And I did, in a cooperative partnership with the mother, who was suprisingly calmer than I suspected she would be. I remember being very scared, but also very motivated to do everything in my power to make sure the process was healthy. It ended up being an extremely fast birth and I remember almost not catching the baby because I was concentrating so much on the umbilical chord. The child was slippery in my hands as it came out. I helped situate the baby onto the mother chest and everthing felt secure and wonderful. All three of us were glowing and smiling. I felt powerful and impressed by life. When I woke up from the dream I was very calm and happy.

to remember a dream when I wake up is very unusual for me; it's been extremely uncommon throughout my life. But the past few days I have been constantly waking up mid-dream. To remember a dream, especially one that I can recall more than a day later, usually is some sort of sign, either affirming or foretelling. During the "Spring Break Quake" of 96 I had a reoccuring dream for two weeks prior to the earthquake that came true the night of the quake. An eerie experience to have. I hope that this current dream means that I'm going to become a doula or a midwife in the future, and not that I'm going to be thrown in charge of any unexpected labors. But on the other hand, at least I'll know it's a good outcome. ;o)

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