1. recycling makes me happy
2. i am spiderphilic rather than phobic
3. i am one of those rare people who really loved high school
4. i want to be a nurse
5. i want to be a social worker
6. i want to be a geologist
7. i care about your health
8. you might not guess it, but i am an introvert
9. when i think of "home" i think of portland, oregon. and i hope that never changes
10. my house is situated half way between downtown portland and the end of the oregon trail
11. i love to bike, but my favorite form of transportation is walking/running/skipping/jumping...your own two feet
12. on october 30th i will be 23
13. no, i still do not have my driver's liscense. i see no problem with this.
14. like my mother, i save money well and spend wisely
15. i love thrift shops
16. in june i will receive a Bachelor of Science degree in Geophysical Science. if you don't know what this is, don't feel bad, hardly anyone knows. ask and i'll be happy to explain it to you.
17. my friends are few and far between in college
18. during my studies here at the UofC I've traveled to India; the Bahamas (San Salvador island); maritime Canada (Nova Scotia, New Brunswick, Price Edward Island, the Isles de la Madeleine, Quebec); Big Bend, Texas; Iceland; Montana, Wyoming, South Dakota, Maine, Pennsylvania, Indiana, Ohio, Kentucky, Tennessee, Connecticut, New York and Missouri.
19. this spring my parents will have their 37th wedding anniversary. i love my family.
20. my sister is 22 months younger than me, but looks older
21. i have two amazing best friends
22. i'm a fourth generation Oregonian
23. i am in awe of the pacific northwest, still
24. i wish i could sew
25. beadwork, basketmaking, and drawing are all things that i'm good at. i need to let my creative side out much more often. i feel like this part of me has been mistakenly in hiding during college
26. i am talented at many things, but more and more i fail to realize this
27. i don't read the Bible as much as I would like to, as much as i need to, as much as i think i do
28. i believe that we are made in God's image and that everyone in this world has value
29. hecklers at sports games make me angry. in the same way, so do trashtalk campaigns. i detest them both immensely.
30. sports at my school is a joke. seriously. it makes me laugh. we have a football team?!?
31. the UofC used to be stars at football, a crazy fact is that we won the first Heizman trophy, but a few decades ago we decided that we would value intelligence (!) over sports and demonlished our grandstands and football fields and build one of our huge libraries right on top of that spot. i applaud them.
32. that's not the say that i don't value sports, i do, but only in certain capacities
33. 3 years ago i suddenly became lactose intolerant, but i still eat ice cream and cheese
34. i love cheese
35. i don't shower every day
36. i am pro-midwives
37. officially i began as a cuddler at the neonatal intensive care unit a week ago and it has been such an amazing, soothing, happy, uplifting time when i've gone in to volunteer
38. i probably spend more time behind a computer each day that i do interacting with people, and this makes me sad
39. i have bad grammar
40. three goals for the future: to be a healer, mentor, mother
41. on tuesday i will be officially trained in CPR/First Aid/AED
42. i never hope to use those skills
43. contrary to what many people think, i am not a vegetarian
44. i LOVE meat, no joke
45. i should have given up blogging for lent
46. i am secretely happy when i get my apartment all to myself
47. i love my roomates
48. i also love fleece
49. in high school i was voted most likely to win the nobel peace prize. but that should have gone to kate.
50. i don't fit in at college. at all. in class, on campus, at church, in chicago. i just don't belong.
51. you might be surprised hearing that and might think i'm exaggerating since many people seem to say this. but it's true. going to the UofC has been a love/hate relationship. I've enjoyed the classes, I've hated some aspects. In all honesty I am very glad and fortunate to have come here, but at the same time I still feel very lonely and seperate from everything around me when I'm here
52. last christmas i bought myself snowshoes. i am a big fan of snowshoeing and xcountry skiing.
53. i like things clean. clean in the sense of sanitary, not necessarily of "everything in its place"
54. my apartment is not clean, this is not my fault
55. when i blow out candels and make a wish once a year, and when i blow on dandelions to release the seeds out into the wind i have wished the same wish my entire life (seriously): i wish i could fly
56. maybe when i'm in heaven this will come true
57. i am in love
58. cartography/ geographic information systems has been one of my favorite classes and i would like to continue on in this field somehow
59. i'm actively seeking employment in portland, oregon. if you have any leads, definitely let me know
60. never in my life have i had a crush on a moviestar, singer, writer, or anyone like that. i've never understood how people can.
61. my idea of beauty is probably much different than yours
62. i'm horrible at singing and dancing, but i like to do both
63. i get embarrassed very very easily
64. my experiences with upward bound as a student and on staff as a resident mentor have been extremely rewarding. it is an amazing federal program
65. i am Pro-Life
66. there are some people in my life who i respect immensely who i have never told. some read this blog
67. i am drawn to genuineness
68. i believe that Jesus is much more than a historical figure: he lived and died and rose again as our savior
69. i have one of the worst memories of anyone you will ever know, and it is deminishing rapidly. this is the thing that i am most scared of. limited capacity for knowledge. sharpness deteriorating. feeling inadequate. needing constant reassurance.
70. i might have known you for the past two years, but i still don't recall your name
71. good manners and nice actions make me smile. i love when people hold doors open for me. i love people who awknowledge you on the sidewalk as you walk past, who help you when you've dropped something, who give random compliments, who pay for meals
72. i've still never been to a blues club. or jazz.
73. i own an SLR camera, but barely know how to use it. i got "honorable mention" in the study abroad photography contest, but probably didn't deserve it. i desperately want to learn more about photography
74. computers hate me, but i love them
75. i have never stolen anything in my life, unless you call mp3's off napster stealing (which i guess means i have)
76. hiking the pacific crest trail (part of it, that is) is a goal of mine.
77. i would like to be a forest ranger
78. i want to live in alaska for some period of my life
79. it's impossible for me to comprehend the holiness of God. the intricasies of His creation of earth and the flora and fauna are so unbelievably amazing and incomprehensive to me, and how much more is God amazing.
80. i've started to keep a list of all of the books i've read
81. i have a nice smile, but don't feel like i show it enough
82. i envy good writers
83. i often imagine people's life stories: when i'm riding the El, in the airport, looking out my window, smiling at someone on the street. I am intrigued by others.
84. i have a passion for helping
85. one of my greatest strengths is my compassion
86. the square graduation cap is one of the worst things ever invented. and can you believe that i can't walk across the stage on june 12th without it? and no decorations either. my school is "traditional". yuck!
87. i love soil
88. i prefer plain paper. no lines please. especially for journals. i hope that i keep a journal for the rest of my life.
89. my aunt died of cancer at a young age. i miss her
90. if you asked me who my role model is i would say my grampa
91. i love hand written letters. and packages. snailmail is so special. letterwriting to me is like a lost art form. it needs to be revived!
92. no, i don't know what i'm doing after graduation, besides returning home
93. this list was inspired by Ashley and Rachel
94. don't categorize me, i'm not what you think. or am i? am i the christian stereotype? the intellectual stereotype?
95. i check away messages and profiles on aim secretely and impulsively
96. i'm not as modest as i used to be, but that's not saying much
97. i have a penpal in northern india
98. i've eaten some unusual things: rattlesnake, whale (muktuck), beaver, caribou, buffalo, musk ox (i told you i love meat!)
99. my favorite place in the world hasn't changed. it's still mosier, oregon
100. i still sleep with my two teddy bears that i've had since birth
101. i'm a very light sensitive person. i seek out windows and natural light wherever i am
102. 2 is my favorite number and i set my alarm to 8:02, 10:02, etc.

Happy Birthday Erin!!!

Gospel & Praise
The Multi-Ethnic chapter of InterVarsity Christian Fellowship in conjuction with Soul Umoja (the UofC's awesome gospel choir) presents: An Evening of Modern Sacred Music: Gospel & Praise. I'm excited! Friday night, 7pm, Ida Noyes Library. Come join me!

Things are crazyfun this week. Wednesday is dancing at Club Minx, Saturday is volunteering with SafeSpace and in the morning going to Back to the Future: Generations of Feminism conference. Mixing in research, cuddling, GeoUnion, a talk on Genetic Modification and it's impact on the environment, plus tons of other stuff makes for a full but neat week.

Also, it's time to pick classes. I have 34 bookmarked that I'm interested in taking right now. At the moment these six are what I have officially selected:
1.) The History of US Public Health [biology]
2.) Health & Healing Across Cultures [human development]
3.) Emergency Response [physical education]
4.) Complex Prob: World Hunger [big problems series]
5.) Technology/Ideology of Sexual Reproduction [sociology]
6.) Intro To Invertebrate Biology [biology]
Ha! Do you see that? No geosci classes for the first time ever~ is this really happening?

My dad has one big charm bracelet, and it's called his motorcycle. Every time I talk to him he mentions his new components that he's added (mostly chrome aesthetic parts). It's really cute to see my dad all excited about his bike though. He's been wanting one for such a long time, and he finally got one last autumn. My mom also wants a motocycle, and one they save up some she's gonna get a Harley.

My First Day of Cuddling
The Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (otherwise known as the NIC-U) is so hard to find! Since they have grown iin size there are two additional rooms to the unit, but there are not attached at all, one is on the floor abovie and another is attached to the PICU on the opposite side of floor 2. After I signed in I was told that there were no babies to hold since almost all of the mothers had come to visit their babies at that time (there are over 30 babies!). So another volunteer and I spent over half an hour trying to find room 6--the third part of the NICU that stilll might need some help, we spoke to a Chaplan, the head of the Adult Wings of the hospital, and then finally ran into the head of Volunteerism. We ended up having a janitor escort us to mysterious room #6. It was a quiet, calming room at the very end of one of the hallways in the Children's ward. The attending nurse brightened when she saw us walk in and was right away receptive to us helping out. It was so wonderful. The first thing that I got to do was change the diapers of this little little tiny girl (4lbs or so) who was in an incubator (is that what they call them??). Her clothes and diaper were *so tiny*! I swaddled her back up in her blankets and held her to me...she was so precious. I couldn't help but gush at the sight of her.
I fed her her bottle, burped her and inspected her beautifully tiny hands, face, expressions, fingernails, soft hair, dark eyes. She fit in the crook of my arm, even bundled up she was only the length of my elbow to my fingers. I couldn't help but smile. The miracle of creation is so amazing!

I double highlight everything. You know what I mean...going back and highlighting in those little spaces between the lines, so that everything becomes one flourescent green box.
I am a perfectionist on those little things.
3 more chapters to go. and piles of notes. once again, i love the material but feel like i do not have enough time to process it.
Today is not Wednesday, it is Tuesday, but after midnight [making it now Wednesday]: Science as subjective says Dewey and my roommate.
Coloring has been my stress-reliever. 12 Crayola colored pencils are my therapy, and homework helpers.

i love the work
i hate the tests.
perfectionist turned.
wishing i was more absorbant.

Scholarship Created for Whites Only

i wish i had time to make valentine's day cards. i would make you all one. and hand them out with a smile like high school. to every single one of you.
but this year i only made 4.
today has not been a good day, yet.

i am a sneaky faux PSU student this afternoon. but i need a job, so i just abuse my sister's powers. career & placement services at the uofc just plan sucks if you're not econ or public policy. it especially sucks if you're looking for anything on the west coast outside of s.cal.
portland is just better at everything.

here's what the federal government has to say under their job placements in portland:
Portland, Oregon - “City of Roses” - has a metro area with a population of 1.8
million within 130 square miles (which includes 37,000 acres of parks), and is
located on the Columbia and Willamette Rivers, just 78 miles from the Pacific
Ocean and 65 miles from the glaciers of Mt. Hood. Temperate in climate (average
33.5 in January and 79.5 in July) Portland has an average rainfall of 37" (less
than Atlanta, Baltimore, Houston or Seattle.) Public transportation is both
accessible and user friendly throughout the region.

i miss home.

Update
I swear, my blog is about as boring as it gets right now. I apologize to all of you still reading this. I want to spruce it up. Redesign the template, type out some deep thoughts and all that. I just feel overwhelmed. But what's new.
Here's what new that actually might be exciting to blog about if I had time:
*I went to the chicago premier of Touching the Void a while back.
*Feb 5-9 was spent in Minneapolis/St. Paul with Kate, and it was excellent.
*Airplanes hate me. Seriously.
*Photography. I really need to scan some of my photos and figure out how to put them up here.
*I'm now an official baby cuddler at the hospital's Neonatal Intensive Care Unit
*I bought pink heels in the past week, belive it or not.
My memory is failing me more and more every day. And basically I'm unhappy. Unproductive. and wishing for more time and inspiration. There's so many things that I want to do, read, study, but I feel like everything is moving too fast around me and I'm standing still.

Biodiversity and Colonization Patterns on Mt. St. Helens and Krakatau: A Comparison
It's scary when you're doing a term paper, and the articles that you're reading mention your very own professor. not only that, but they site him as (personal communication). yikes. why did i have to choose this exact topic that he knows so much about? i've never plagerized and i never plan to, but this term paper prospectus I've got to be extra extra extra careful about citing my sources and analyzing the data since he knows this all by heart.

Science & Art
Scientists have linked "The Scream," to the eruption of Krakatoa in 1883.
Something to think about: 'Out of Gas': They're Not Making More

At the end of Cultural Geography this afternoon Prof. Mikesell asked for people in the class to raise their hand if they knew where they wanted to live. After he gave a lecture on "Earth Day and Today: Environmental Ideology" he was wondering if people still identified closely with the environment that they will live in and if they actively evaluate it in terms of living conditions. I was the only person who raised my hand.
I've always wanted to take a pole to see how strong people's sense of Place are. From as far back as I can remember I've always been a person who evaluated my surroundings constantly.
Ok, this post is nowhere near done...more on this later...karin and i got caught up on a karaoke session in our room. hehe..
ps. I'm heading to Minneapolis tomorrow! Vacation until Monday with the lovely Katherine. :o)

Ramble
I just bought my mom a surprise gift online to be sent media-mail. She is going to be very confused at first but then I *know* she is gong to love it: Teitur: Poetry & Aeroplanes.
I'm so behind in work, in reading, in everything I want to accomplish. Not much has been checked off my to-do list. AND, I did not apply for the India program. It would just make me sad if I got in and had to tell them that I can't go...so I guess there is no real reason to apply...so I didn't. Maybe another year?
I did watch the SuperBowl. It wasn't about the game, or the commercials or the halftime show (all of which were pretty lame), it was about the people I was with. Just to get that straight. And there's nothing wrong with watching it, or not watching it.
I also just bought:
* plane tickets to MSP to see Kate!!! thurs night- mon night. Monday is "Suicide Prevention Day" here at the UofC.
* got 6 rolls of film developed, including one whole roll from India which was just found, and two rolls from backpacking in the Porcupine Mountains in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan last Memorial Day Weekend.
* cleaning supplies for my apt
* new super nice black ink 0.3mm fine pens to draw/write with
* groceries...
All amounting to way too much money. But oh well. Tuition refund checks make me smile. I am so blessed.