I'm loving autumn. Love love love. My favorite time of year. The temperature is just perfect: not too cold, but chilly enough for sweaters, fleece and fires. A cozy, snuggly, colorful & nourishing season with lots of rain and harvest.

My Dream
Recently I had a dream which was both scary and awesome. I don't remember very many details, but I dreamt that I delivered a healthy baby with only the help of the mother. I was with someone in a room who was in labor, and she was waiting for her midwife or doctor, but when the doctor came in to care for the mom, she left the room and politely and cheerfully said that I would take care of the birth. She was confident in me. So I thought: "ok, this is crazy, but I'll do it. I'll deliver this baby. I am capable." And I did, in a cooperative partnership with the mother, who was suprisingly calmer than I suspected she would be. I remember being very scared, but also very motivated to do everything in my power to make sure the process was healthy. It ended up being an extremely fast birth and I remember almost not catching the baby because I was concentrating so much on the umbilical chord. The child was slippery in my hands as it came out. I helped situate the baby onto the mother chest and everthing felt secure and wonderful. All three of us were glowing and smiling. I felt powerful and impressed by life. When I woke up from the dream I was very calm and happy.

to remember a dream when I wake up is very unusual for me; it's been extremely uncommon throughout my life. But the past few days I have been constantly waking up mid-dream. To remember a dream, especially one that I can recall more than a day later, usually is some sort of sign, either affirming or foretelling. During the "Spring Break Quake" of 96 I had a reoccuring dream for two weeks prior to the earthquake that came true the night of the quake. An eerie experience to have. I hope that this current dream means that I'm going to become a doula or a midwife in the future, and not that I'm going to be thrown in charge of any unexpected labors. But on the other hand, at least I'll know it's a good outcome. ;o)

Yesterday riding the MAX I ran into a girl I knew and was really good friends with from a summer program in high-school. I haven't seen her since then. She sat down next to me with her friend and chatted for 30 minutes. I recognized her right away, but she gave no indication of remembering me. It was hard for me not to say hi, but it would be extremely awkward with her friend sitting there (and I would have had to interrupt their conversation)...and what was I supposed to say anyways? Especially if she didn't remember me. Then she'd either make me feel bad by not remembering or else pretend to remember and then jumble through a hi-howsitgoing conversation making small talk. "Hi, remember me from the summer of 97? you borrowed my two favorite shirts and never gave them back?" Yah, I want those back now.

Today's a day of "let's pretend I have a LOT of work to do when really I don't". So I called every Fire Department in the general vicinity of Portland just to verify that their stations haven't moved, address is the same, etc. Most of the people answering the phone were super friendly, but there was one lady who was very suspicious of me. I guess it was the second (!) call she's had asking for the location of their fire stations. Even after I told her who I was and what agency I was working for to update our databases she acted like I was some kind of terrorist trying to spy and get information that is top-secret. It was silly.
I have nothing to do and I have over an hour to go still. I'm just "too fast" according to my boss. She swamped with a management work right now so she doesn't have time to create some kind of project for me to do. She's been looking around for little tasks, but can't find any. Or when she does it takes me only a short while to do (and that's even when I'm slacking and doing other things like surfing the net at the same time). It's really kind of odd, because since I've finished my part of the BIG project I've been working on a month early I have nothing to do, but I was promised full time work until the beginning of November. And even then I'm taking days off to start my Metro job early.

I don't think that "we've dropped you from consideration" is a nice way to put it. Especially in an email. But oh well, it's my own fault for not sending a thank-you letter. The office setting was cozy, the work was nice, but the job wasn't right for me and neither were my would-be coworkers. In other job news, there is another job which is promising but it WAY too far away. 4 hour commutes each day are just out of the question. At this point I'm not going to take the job, even if it is an excellent one.

I love Portland. Especially on warm sunny beautiful days like today. There's just one thing missing. And unfortunately he can't be lured or enticed by an iPod. I tried.

Portland Nursery is having their annual Apple-Tasting Festival this weekend. Who's coming with me?

Tonight is party night for the TriMet GIS department. I really like my coworkers so it'll be good. Then after pad thai and drinks Paul & I will be driving north to Vancouver BC. Hopefully we'll get in around midnight or so. We'll be celebrating Thanksgiving with a family there on Sunday night, which is pretty neat, and staying with a friend who is going to seminary in Vancouver. I think it'll be a fun weekend, although I am sick and have a cold, which is no no fun.
ps. I officially took the job at Metro. The "talk" with Hillsboro is Thursday.
blah. no time to write. these are so boring.

Yesterday I looked at the calendar and found out that Monday is Thanksgiving in Canada, and that's when I'll be in Vancouver, BC. They celebrate it: "For general thanksgiving to Almighty God for the blessings with which the people of Canada have been favoured". Anyone know any more information on this holiday?

today is a good day. even though it started out bad by me oversleeping through my alarm and being late. maybe it was the calming effect of Whale Rider last night. Or the way that jobs are starting to mesh together. Right now I'm on the last steps of the 2004 Origin-Destination Study and it feels good! I'm looking forward to this weekend. Friday night is a GIS party and then we're off to Vancouver BC for Saturday-Sunday-Monday.

I'm so confused. All this information and all these opportunities are whirling around and I'm not sure what to do or how to communicate. I hate being indecisive. Everything is overlapping and I hate letting anyone down.

This weekend was fun. On Saturday we went on a sporatic trip to Cannon Beach, which was both a good and bad idea. Good because we built sandcastles of pyramids, Mayan temples and other points of pilgrimage at a prime location on the beach, but bad because no one thought to check the weather at the beach when we left Portland. Even those of us who have lived here all our lives and know the weather. Just because it's sunny and hot in Portland doesn't mean that it's the picture perfect day on the coast. Hehe. So we played in the sand, cold and fog and then drove back to town. Then Paul & I went to the Greek Festival at Holy Trinity Greek Orthodox Church. It was really neat. We went into the church and listened to a Bishop answer questions for about 40 minutes. I learned a lot about eastern orthodox church doctrine, architecture and art. Then we got gyros, spanikopita and lots of greek desserts to go. YUM.

Employment!
Great news! I got the GIS Planning Internship with Metro. It looks like a really neat position: "The purpose of this internship is to provide GIS assistance to Data Resource Center staff in researching historic redevelopment and infill trends in the metropolitan region. The intern will assist in analyzing aerial photos, building permit information and county assessment records to calculate the metro area 'refill rate' (the proportion of development being supported by redevelopment and infill); and creat a refill database..."
I haven't officially accepted it yet. The problem I am encountering is that I still am working fulltime for TriMet until the beginning of November, but Metro wants me to start on October 18th. Also, I hope I am getting the GIS Technician position with the City of Hillsboro, and so I need to figure out if the schedules for the two part-time positions would mesh well or not. I really don't want to say no to this Metro position, but it's at the low end of the barrel in terms of wages, and it's not as long term as other positions (until approx. January). But at the same time, the people I interviewed with were really nice and I think it would be a great learning experience; I love the actual project--it's really cool to be working analyzing the Urban Growth Boundary. I called today and they are willing to be flexible to hire me. It feels so good to be wanted by an employer! I'm really happy, it's just hard for me to try to figure out how this is all going to work. And I'll be without benefits or healthcare by the end of the month, which is a little scary.

Volcano
It's a GORGEOUS day, sunny and 80 degrees & Mount St Helens is erupting (don't worry folks, it's a small one) and I'm stuck inside this office building. Too bad I couldn't go out and see the spectacle. Maybe she'll give us another show this weekend.